Not Again ;; Sov

[lenora]

The Emperor was impressed that Cid had not killed anyone... he was even more impressed that Lord Malaise had returned. Though he usually reserved his personal feelings to the loving side of the family in Lord Phalanx, the Emperor couldn't help but clutch Cid's shoulder and tell him how glad he was that he returned. He... really wasn't expecting him to return at all. The temptation to do as one pleased was a great one, and one that he knew deep down that he would not have the strength to conquer.

Claudius was almost in tears of joy that Cid came back on his own will... and didn't even kill anyone! That was a man with control! It was actually Sir Vigilance who felt the psychic tugs of the girl's emotions awakening. The Pokemon shut his eyes and sighed. The Emperor did what an Emperor should do when getting attacked... but it did not make it easy. He mentally alerted the Emperor of the news, but he did not move from his seat.

Would she learn obedience as her uncle did? To control herself when she needed to? He thought to himself how to play things out next as he simply gazed out the window at the view of the land and sky.

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

It didn't matter to Ashah that Cid had returned without killing anyone - he'd still caused them pain and suffering, even if no-one actually died. The main thing here was that Ashah blamed herself, and she knew it was her fault without a doubt. The Emperor had warned her that this would happen, and it had and she felt absolutely terrible about it ... People could have died because of her stubborness and that was something she would never forgive herself for. She was lucky this time that Cid had controlled himself. Very lucky indeed.

Still it didn't make her feel any better. Cid had personally bragged about the pain he'd caused people and how he'd hurt them, and the rumours had reached the girl once she had awoken. Even as she made her way through the halls to her room she could hear the whispers of what he had done. They were all surprised he hadn't killed anyone, despite his freedom, but Ash still felt horrible. She was going to have to keep her mouth shut in future if she didn't want anyone else to ever get hurt. This was all her fault after all.

The gemale found her room and instantly closed the door behind her as she entered, not interested at all in seeing anyone - including Growlithe and Espeon who watched her closely as she collapsed against a wall and slid down to the ground, clutching her head in her hands. Two people had almost killed her now, and she was lucky to have survived both attacks upon her life. She had a feeling that if it ever happened again she wasn't going to be as lucky. That was the last thing on her mind however, as she was currently tired and distraught.

She would stay in that room forever if she could.

[lenora]

Sir Vigilance pondered matters with the Emperor. He had no answer for him, as she broke the rules and almost paid for it with her life. The Emperor just sat there, admiring the view distantly. He offered his apologies about her Pokemon, and yet she still couldn't at least accept them? Would honesty not be enough to bring order to this region?

A thought then crossed his mind. He looked over to Sir Vigilance. Several hours had passed since she had entered her room. He bowed as they traded thoughts and he went someplace that he had not been to in awhile... the kitchen.

After getting some tea, Sir Vigilance decided to check on the girl and give the offer that The Emperor had after a spot of relaxing tea. The tray hovered behind the Pokemon as he stood outside of her room door.

Lady Wolfe, are you decent? I brought you some tea. It should help dull the pain around thine eyes.

If it was one thing the Emperor had forgotten about women is that they required times to speak their mind. With all of the stress, he had been beyond unforgiving... but he needed her cooperation and understanding to work with the rest of the team.

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

Ashah was honestly not in the mood for company - no matter who it was. She was frightened and on the verge of a break down. If word of Cid's fun hadn't gotten to her then she would have just been angry that the Emperor tried to kill her, although she had always been afraid of him. Now though she was terrified and she no longer had the urge to make the man angry. In fact she planned on staying in that room until someone made her come out. And even then she wasn't going to just sit back and let it happen. At least if she was locked away in there then her actions couldn't get anyone else hurt.

At first the female didn't seem to realise that it was Sir Vigilance calling to her and as such quickly cowered in the corner of the room. She had it in her head that the Emperor was going to come back to finish the job and really kill her this time. Perhaps it wasn't just her fear telling her that though - she was in pain, both physically and emotionally and it was clouding her mind and making her feel all sorts of things, and think them as well ... She really couldn't help it though. A lot had happened.

With Ash in the corner, trying to hide away, Growlithe curled up beside her while Espeon made her way to the door, reached up on her hind legs and used both her paws to push down on the handle and let it swing open. When the lilac pokemon was back on all fours she tilted her head and watched Sir Vigilance closely. "Please come in, Sir Vigilance. My mistress is ... She just needs some company." Espeon spoke in a series of cat-like noises.

[lenora]

Sir Vigilance's eyes softened and bowed to the Espeon. He stode into the room and levitated the tea to a nearby table. As a soldier he felt sorry for the Emperor. If anyone were to come up to strike him, he would have done the exact same thing. Still, he also knew that hitting a woman was not an easy thing for The Emperor to swallow.

Tis not my delight to see this... though I wish she could have controlled herself. The Emperor has been trained in martial combat since his youth... to strike a soldier is to invite his instincts. I can not apologize for him... but... to lay a hand on him, even I would have been forced to act against her. I do not ask her to understand or even forgive us... but for her own sake play things wiser... Some for you, dear Espeon?

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

Espeon bowed her head back slightly before retreating backwards on her four legs before settling down in a sitting position with her head tilted. A sigh could be heard escaping her mouth and her large eyes closed before she glanced quickly over at her mistress and the Growlithe trying to comfort her, before she turned back to Sir Vigilance. "I think that whats hurting her most is Cid hurting people ... She was never like this before, but when he killed her family she became angry. The threat of Cid hurting even more people scared her. I think that's why she hit the Emperor. She knew there would be consequences ..."

The Espeon attempted her best at a smile though it was forced and sad at that. "She just needs time. My mistress is still grieving over the loss of her family and half the time she doesn't even know what she's doing. It's hard for her - she's used to being loved and cared for but she has nobody left. I understand that her anger and her attempt to hurt the Emperor was the cause of this. I think she understands to, it's just harder for her. She's scared of him although she won't admit it but she still won't apologise to him. I hope he won't hold that against her. The last thing my mistress needs now is to be in even more pain, or to hear of other people suffering. As you can see she's not taking any of this very well ..."

In fact Ashah was still curled up in the corner of the room, shaking. She hated herself right then.

[lenora]

Tis not as if he does this for his own pleasure as Cid does... he carries a heavy weight.

He poured the tea through his psychic power, offering a saucer to the Espeon. He Levitated a cup of the tea to the nightstand near the bed, letting Ashe tend to it at her own leisure. He wanted to give her the distance she needed for now, allowing her to calm down.

He loathes the fact he struck a woman... He is more at peace with Cid returning under his own desire, but he feared that Lord Malaise would be too tempted to continue his rampage. Many believe the nobility have all they desire. Not a true noble. Too many lives are in the balance of his existence for him to have a life of his own. Tis unlikely her Ladyship will understand such a thing... and tis something the Emperor has not the luxury to understand.

The Gallade sat like a gentleman, being there when Ashe was ready to calm down, but not leaving her either. He would wait a bit before inquiring if she desired to meet the Emperor again.

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

"I think my mistress knows that ... But even so, it doesn't make her feel any better." Whether or not the Emperor enjoyed hurting people or watching them suffer was of no consequence, because in the female's eyes he was still evil, and every thing she said to him was true, at least to her. She truly meant everything that came forth from her own mind and she would never take it back. The only thing she regretted was hurting him. After all, Ash was a sweet girl and she didn't like hurting people. Cid was the only one she ever wanted to sway her own rules for.

The Espeon leaned forward to drink the tea from the saucer, nodding briefly in gratitude. It was nice and calming. Really that was what she needed, with having to look after her distraught mistress. Ash was in a bad state, and although her crying was slowly coming to a stop, it was obvious that she was still going to be angry and upset with herself for a long time after this. "I thank you for coming here, Sir Vigilance. I'm sure that you're presence will calm my mistress down." Ashah had taking a liking to the Gallade - she would even go as far as to call him her friend. "And though she may not seem it now, I'm sure she is grateful that in the very least, Cid came back without doing more serious damage. She just feels guilty for causing it."

The Espeon turned at the sound of shifting. Ash had lifted her head, no longer crying, but more in a state of being an 'empty shell'. She was almost lifeless, just staring aimlessly ahead at the cup of tea. She didn't know what to do but to just sit there.

[lenora]

I was asked to arrive and inquire if she wanted to speak her mind freely against the Emperor. If it would allow her to let it all out, perhaps that would soothe her mind and have her less likely to hurt herself. Since Cid was able to control himself even with permitting him chaos, perhaps if she was permitted to... explode... then it would get things out of her system in a safe manner. She has endangered herself twice in her grief...

Sir Vigilance was the "Phalanx" pokemon of the two royal generation Pokemon. Lady Desade was far from a lady at times, particularly with women getting close to the Emperor. Still, her heart had a viable reason for her cruelty. Centuries of protecting her previous family and not being able to be more than a Pokemon would torture anyone. He was glad he was able to calm his lovely bride and one day pass into the hereafter with her.

Ah, but to the topic at hand! His eyes got slightly distant thinking of his wife, but he turned his attention to Ashe's catatonic state, trying to gently nudge her forward.

Chin up, my lady.

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

Espeon decided that this was a good idea. Perhaps Ashah would go for it to, if she could gather up her energy enough to actually get to the Emperor that is. Besides that she was terrified of him, and had it in her head that he was now out to get her as well. Cid was already after her life and only hadn't killed her because he was ordered not to. As much as the man was reckless he at least listened to orders. There weren't many people that Cid liked, but he respected the Emperor and the other man was probably the only person he even considered liking. So Ash was lucky.

"I think that might help ... If only my mistress would get back on her feet." The feline pokemon spoke softly, shaking her head. She didn't know if the girl would want to see the Emperor, but she hoped that she would, if it would make her feel even just a little bit better. Espeon knew that Ash didn't hate the Emperor as such, she was just stressed out at everything and finding it all very difficult. It wasn't like anyone here was being nice to her after all.

At the sound of Sir Vigilance's voice, Ash finally seemed to notice that he was there and tilted her head just slightly. Without thinking, she bgan to speak in a rather tired, almost emotionless voice, though it hid her inner turmoil. "Cid has hurt people ... And it's my fault." She barely cared that she could have been killed - only that people had suffered because of her behaviour, and there was nothing she could do to change that. She felt absolutely horrible.

[lenora]

Lord Malaise hurt people because he chose to hurt people. All the Emperor ordered was for him to do as he pleased... twas he who knew he would hurt people and removed his leash. The responsibility is his.

And Sir Vigilance knew it... it was a dangerous act of him to do, but he appeared willing to take the consequences. Sir Vigilance looked over to Ash with gentle eyes.

Because he was able to control himself somewhat, the Emperor has decided to see if allowing you to speak your mind without reprecussion would ease your spirit. Your state of mind hath nearly slain you twice... you must release it somehow before it consume thee.

The Gallade sipped his tea calmly with the Espeon, allowing it to hear the mental conversation through its own psychic abilities.

Just... do not strike him this time... he was bred to be a soldier and his instincts are to kill those who attack him. That is the reason he lashed out at you.

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

Well that was true. Cid didn't have to hurt any one. He could have chosen not to. Cid being Cid though just had to make people suffer, as that was what he liked doing the most. As for the Emperor, well he could have thought of another punishment for Ash, but still she blamed herself. If she had kept her mouth shut then none of this would have happened, and she wouldn't have to feel this guilty and this bad about it. She knew that she had to pull herself together and try not to blame herself, but she was. The Emperor's punishment was working.

The girl sighed and shook her head, clearly still suffering emotionally. "Why would the Emperor care if I let my mind consume me? Or if I died." She asked. She didn't really think that the man would care - he had'nt been at all nice to her from the start and although Ash knew she was partly to blame, it wasn't all her fault. She was just confused to all of this. Sure she'd like to speak her mind, but she would have appreciated that a couple of days ago, before she almost ended up dead again. Now she was just terrified of the man. What if he changed his mind and decided to punish her again?

[lenora]

Because you are family... allow me to enlighten you on why he threatened your Growithe... he is bound completely by the laws of our nation. It is the reason he goes to war. Trespassers upon military property are to be slain on sight. If he did not try to slay someone, he would be going against the law himself. When Lord Phalanx made the suggestion that bringing you to Cid would be a fate worse than death, he gave him an option out which was not against the law.

The Gallade sipped his tea once again, finally getting an open ear to Ash.

He can not even spare his own family against the law... that is the true reason your family died. The reason this whole war is being fought because that law which has held our kingdom together for many centuries. He is the high executor of that law and is damned to put it even above his own happiness so that his people can live in peace. Those family who follow the laws are the only people he is allowed to call family... which is why for the past three days his heart was wrenched and his many bottles of wine tapped. He feared that Cid would not return in the three days and cave to his lust for carnage... but he returned.

He offered to fill the saucer of the Espeon for her, offering some sugar if she desired.

If you were able to understand the law... then he would have hope that he would not be able to use direct force against the people he must return to the Sovereignty. He could embrace the people as citizens rather than completely need to conquer them. The law, however, does not give him the full luxury of love... as the law is above anything else that he could ever love.

He took the tea to his lips before pausing one more time.

The nobles would call him absolutely selfish... but he loves his family... and without a true outlet outside of the law to show it. He rejoiced when Cid returned... even weeping in his inner chambers, but I urge you not to repeat my confidence.

[ASHAH-RAINE WOLFE !]

Everything that Sir Vigilance said made sense, although for now it was all a little too much. No matter the reason Growlithe's life was threatened, Ashah would never forgive it. She was family? Yes in a way, and no in another - she'd only recently met the Emperor and did not see him as family. Everything the Order stood for disgusted Ashah, and had done so fro her father as well, as was the reason her family was dead now. Even if the Emperor was a decidedly nice person she probably wouldn't like him just because of who he was. "I get what you're saying ... But it doesn't really change any thing for me. My family are still dead, Cid is still causing suffering and I ... I can't do anything about it." She couldn't save her family, Growlithe was almost killed, and she certainly had'nt been able to do anything about Cid's most recent victims.

The female turned away, still shaking her head as Espeon gladly drank up the rest of the milk in her saucer. "Sure we're family ... But he didn't mind letting Cid kill the rest of them. Sometimes I wonder if death would have been a less painful path to walk down." Rather than staying there and alive that is. She was still suffering now any way, and honestly felt horrible every day. All she wanted and needed was a little love and compassion. To feel like she had a family again, because until she did she was going to continue to feel like crap and she'd never get over it.

"I feel like I want to talk to him properly but I don't deserve to have the chance to feel better." She was beating herself up about what happened, but hearing that the Emperor could be like that, and care for others, made her want to end all of this. Still, she was letting herself suffer because she felt like she deserved that.